Impress…or Depressed?!

Filed in Relationships by on October 30, 2012 1 Comment

Romantic Couple Toasting Red WineGentlemen, I don’t think there is enough content for men about relationships. I will contribute to change this less than equitable behavior. Let’s start with a topic which I find intriguing to say the least:  How to impress a woman.

What should we do to impress a woman? What do we say? How do we impress her enough to attract her?

Let me start by saying, I’m from the south and I’ll be the first to tell you chivalry is not dead. I will hold doors, open car doors, pull out chairs, and whatever else may be befitting in my mind for how a gentleman should treat a lady. I’m lucky enough to travel frequently and I have heard guys say “what are you doing?” when I hold a door for a woman. I have also gotten the looks of disgust when I open the door for someone which may delay someone else for a moment. Let me tell you, it’s not that crucial…I will always treat a woman the way the ladies in my family deserve to be treated. I think this should be par for the course. Not optional. If you want to win at relationships, treat your woman they way you would want your mother or grandmother treated.

My initial question was “what should we do to impress a woman?” If you’re digging someone, chances are you want them to know you’re digging them, without coming across goofy or too forward. Therefore, what you should do to impress a woman is….drum roll…nothing! You shouldn’t be trying to impress them at all. You should be trying to get to know them and vice-versa. Women often say they are taking applications, but the truth of the matter is the person who does not submit an “application” is the person who will wind up with the girl. We are often trying to talk to her about what we do, how much money we make, what our title is or who we know. Guess what, she doesn’t care! She wants to get to know you. She wants to know what kinds of movies you like, or if you like movies at all. She wants to know if you are confident. Confidence is an attractive trait for a woman. She wants to know if you are funny. You don’t have to be Chris Tucker funny, but you have to clearly have a sense of humor and most importantly, be able to make HER laugh. Women want to be able to relax around you. They want to be able to talk to you, confide in you, even vent to you.

You will find in most cases, mature women don’t even think about what they can get out of you…they think about you being there for them and WITH them. You don’t have to TRY to impress a woman to be impressive. If you really want to be impressive, here’s a tip: Be ambitious. Show her you have a vision for your life and hopefully that includes her. Show her you are working toward your goals and dreams. But don’t just talk about it–be about it! Include her in your journey.

In the title of the article, I mentioned “depressed” so I want to expound. Guys that are trying to impress women who clearly have no clue about making a good impression are depressing to women. Guys, let’s give our ladies hope to have successful relationships, not to be depressed with men because of examples like these: A woman once told me this guy she was talking to had 4 children, he was unemployed and lived at home with his mom, but he had awesome “game.” Depressing. That equates to a having a 4-cylinder Lamborghini with no A/C, cloth interior, one of the wheels has a hubcap and the scissor doors are broken. Quite depressing! Here’s another instance: Sending someone an unsolicited photo of your “lack of confidence” which you call manhood…quite depressing. Fellas, real talk–women don’t want to see that. All you might get that night, is a restraining order! You have to stimulate her mind. Interestingly enough, if you get to know her, you will find out she will stimulate your mind as well.  That’s impressive!

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About the Author ()

Jay Hurt is the author of The 9 Tenets of a Successful Relationship-for Singles. Personal experience, a liberation through faith and an appreciation for his perspective led Jay to share his insight on relationships. Dealing with challenging topics by confronting them with faith and common sense, Jay aspires to share wisdom to help others become fulfilled and blessed in their relationships. Jay lives in Nashville, TN and has two daughters, Kristina and Jalen.

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